First example: Wannabe by the Spice Girls. "If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends?" Come on now, a guy must have penned those lyrics. What girl says that to her guy? Unless she is a major swinger...and then the next line should have been "And I will get with yours, until the fun time ends." This song is to the Swingers Club what Katy Perry's I Kissed A Girl was to Lesbians of America. And really, what is a "zigazig ah"?
Next song is Glad You Came by the Wanted. "Hand you another drink, drink it if you can." Whhhaaatt? Why? Did you roofie it? Are you really glamorizing getting a girl drunk so she can, "Look well on me"?
Only Katy Perry could make sex with an alien seem super hot. I mean, after listening to E.T. I get pretty jealous that I don't have an alien beaming me up at 2am for a booty call. If 2012 is really the end of the world, I hope aliens invade the Earth a few hours before we self destruct so that I can be filled with his poison and be stunned with his lasers. That bitch Katy...she has everything!
And Rihanna..."Sex in the air, I don't care, I love the smell of it"....refer back to my blog on the disgusting truth about vaginas for explanation of that lyric.
For those Twilight fans, you should recognize Flightless Bird, American Mouth from the prom scene and again during the wedding. Nice song, until you look up the lyrics. Which of course, I happen to do in my spare time. "I was a quick wet boy, diving too deep for coins. All of your street light eyes wide on my plastic toys. Then when the cops closed the fair, I cut my long baby hair. Stole me a dog-eared map and called for you everywhere." I can't. Speechless. Who the what?
These people make MILLIONS off writing these lyrics and my lyrical genius self (blowing the ego horn) pinches pennies. It blows my mind. Like rubber bands shaped as animals earned someone millions. Hamsters on wheels. A ticklish Elmo. I apparently sleep too much.
Finally Meatloaf...before I even pick on his lyrics, I need to know how did he come up with his artist name? I mean was he eating dinner, got a call from his agent who said they would sign him right there and then if he came up with a name and so he went with the first thing he laid his eyes on? Meatloaf just oozes sex appeal. I can so see why you would go with it. Anyways this loaf of red hot meat would do anything for love, but he will not do that. WHAT IS THAT? Way to leave us hanging and guessing! I mean no wonder relationships are complicated, there can not be guessing games! If I had to take a stab at what he is talking about, my guess would be he wasn't willing to get with her friends or he wouldn't zigazig ah...
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